I have often been doing some yoga in the morning lately, followed by meditation. While meditating this morning, a thick presence rose up my body. It melted my mind. It made my face scrunch up for a few moments, as if my head was adjusting to the bliss that came with the melting. I adjusted into a blissful state, full of vibrant colors of aliveness. I was set free. I saw how my normal state of being mentally involved with the world, obsessed with how things are going in my life and trying to improve it, was completely gone. I was completely satisfied in every way, and yet the state had nothing to do with satisfaction. It was more like a blissful state with a sense of completeness, with no question of satisfaction or dissatisfaction. I noticed that in that moment my whole life was fulfilled. And it became hilarious to see the contrast between that moment and my usual situation in life of struggling with everything. I sat there laughing.
The parasite cleansing products available end up being expensive because a parasite cleanse can take months and usually needs to be repeated. Also, in my opinion they are not very potent and often the black walnut hull isn’t prepared correctly.
I decided to make my own. I went to a good organic herb supplier, Mountain Rose Herbs and bought 4 ounces each of quassia, clove and wormwood. Then I visited Darcy From the Forrest at Ebay and got her 4 ounce Green Walnut Hull Tincture. The walnut hulls have to be made into a tincture while fresh or else they are not anti-parasite, and Darcy’s is made correctly, strong, and very inexpensive.
I made a tincture by putting the whole herbs in a half gallon jar and filling it with 100 proof vodka (on a full moon even!). I put this jar in the dark for a few weeks, and shook it up now and then. Then I strained it into 4 ounce dropper bottles as I needed it, mixing in 1/4 of Darcy’s Green Walnut Hull Tincture. I took a dropper full five times a day or so, for three months. A dropper full is probably 1/2 teaspoon. As the months passed the tincture got more and more potent.
I could also have just ground the herbs up in my coffee grinder and taken them in powdered form; a teaspoon twice a day on an empty stomach for three months. I would have taken the walnut tincture along with it.
I spent about $30. and it made about 16 ounces. One ounce of a similar tincture you can buy, that is not nearly as potent, costs at least $10.
Web design is one of the services I offer in a gift economy.
I do standard web sites, blogs, photoblogs, forums, community portals, and galleries. I work with various CMS including Wordpress, Pixelpost and Drupal.
Here are two examples of my work:
The services I offer in a gift economy include web design, computer repair, virus and malware removal, and computer tutoring.
This will be stuff about this category and what I do here.
1986…
They were naked and appeared to be quite absorbed with each other. They didn’t notice me walk into the room. The girl she was in bed with was one of our friends. Although I didn’t like her very much, the situation looked very tempting, so I took off my clothes and got in bed with them. After a minute or so my girlfriend got up, grabbed my hand, and took me to another bedroom, leaving the other girl laying there alone.
2008…
While doing qigong I was noticing, as I had for the past few days, my mind wanting to control my experience. Specifically, I was trying to “be present” and the effort of that was making a sort of collision in my head between the flow of awareness and my effort. The collision was like an opaque knot of stress in my otherwise clear and calm inner space. I found I could not do anything about it and was frustrated to have it happening again. Then somehow knew I didn’t have to do anything and as I accepted the situation a lightness came over me. I was filled with a white liquid ecstasy that poured into my head. It filled me completely and I stood there giggling in this little inside world of pure liquid bliss.
2008…
As I breathe from my stomach right now it is as if I am breathing along with the earth.
Towards the end of my qigong session this morning and into my meditation my stomach suddenly felt new. I was breathing from my new stomach. As it rose and fell I was increasingly located there. A power built up that felt quite new. It felt like my body was being set free, and I was inhabiting it for the first time. The energy rose up and integrated with my heart.
1986…
Gary had an uncanny ability to stay on the back of a motorcycle, at high speed, while passed out after days of partying on alcohol, marijuana and speed. I remember the first time he did that. It was 2 a.m. and we were traveling the 20 miles from Fairfield to Ottumwa to buy more drugs. We were going pretty fast, up to 80 miles per hour on the straight parts of the road. When I realized that Gary had passed out I slowed down and woke him up. But he just fell back asleep. I woke him up again and asked if we should stop. He said no, that he was fine. So I kept going. After a few late night trips like this I gained confidence in his ability to sleep and ride. Ottumwa had drugs and strip clubs. Fairfield had Maharishi and golden domes filled with thousands of meditators. They were neighboring small towns out in the middle of the corn fields in Iowa.
